By Porsche George AMFT

As a child you hear that “beauty is skin deep or beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” Growing up I was surrounded by a large family that showed love and support to one another. As I grew up viewing love, I thought I had a great idea of what it was and how to improve self-love towards myself, was something that came naturally because of my experience as a child. It wasn’t until middle school came around where my self-love was questioned. Self-love is defined as regard for one’s own well-being and happiness. 

My middle school days was a point in time where self-love and beauty was a reflection “of the beholder.” At that time beauty included light skin tones, name brand clothing and being a part of the popular crowd. This caused me to question my identity, not think I was pretty/beautiful and decreased my self-love because of the bullying and negative comments about being too dark, teeth being big and not having the name brand clothing. As time continued and I matured I started to invest in myself by being surrounded by people who added to my life and could value me for who I am. Years passed by and I remained busy with educational activities, sports, and hanging with peers where we started to define our own Self-love and attempted to not let society dictate what beauty was, which at times was difficult. 

When it comes to my self-love currently I am able to be open with myself and share areas that I am strong and those in which I struggle. It has always been consistent that I love to socialize and love to converse with others.

The mission for my self-love is hope, improving self, and a life helping those in need along the way. Some of the examples that I say to myself and shows in my actions are:

“I like to talk.”

“I want to know how to be the best me I can be/successful.”

“I regret not being consistent at times.”

“I’m always looking for ways to earn more money.”

“I am best when I am at my happiest.”

These responses show the passion, drive and hope for a better life and how I try to achieve it. Within each of the responses it gives a better overview of the perception of self and self-love. 

If you take anything from me know that Self-love is a feeling, a way of life, it helps you fight through the difficult times, and it helps you expand your view and perspective on life.