Daddy’s Girls

By: Pastor Samuel J. Casey

As a father of three children two who identify as female and one who now
identifies as a transgender male I think it’s important for me to be the best example of what it means to be the first man, father, priest, provider, and protector that our children experienced. Having not grown up with a father myself I made it my intentional purpose to make sure that I was going to be what I didn’t have myself, a father. This has not always been an easy task. I remember driving home one day on the 210 freeway and in a moment of contemplation and deep reflection I found myself becoming emotionally undone and begin to cry uncontrollably. After I gathered myself I discovered that at the seat of all my emotions was the fact that I had a revelation that had me dumfounded. Get this… I was jealous of my three children. Hold up… what kind of psychosis is this?

I the father of three amazing, gifted, loving, Godly, intelligent, strong, independent, progressive, energetic, gracious, kind, reflections of myself was jealous of them. What I had come to realize was they would never have to know what it felt like to miss their Daddy, to reach for their Daddy, long for their Daddy, wonder what their Daddy was like or even contemplate his love for them. They would never have to wonder who their biggest fan, groupie, or supporter was at each and every one of their basketball games or cheer competitions. I have discovered that one of my greatest joys, achievements, and assignments on my life is being Samantha’s, Tamia’s, and Kourtny’s Daddy! Now this has not always been an easy, pain, and worry-free journey and I’ve had many days and moments that my heart ached but here’s the powerful lessons that I’m
learning:
1.) Learning to support them and with the help of the Father launch them into their destiny through prayer.
2.) Consistency is important because they hold us to our word.
3.) Words matter. Not what I say as much as how I conveyed what I needed to communicate.
4.) Spiritual, emotional, and physical presence are more important than the material.
5.) How I loved their mother and treated other women mattered because they’re watching.
6.) I had to learn how to balance and temper each of their unique personalities, moods, and needs.
7.) At times love from a distance and learn to allow them to fail so they can learn resilience.
8.) As they age balance the role of being their Daddy still with also becoming their friend as you realize they are becoming adults themselves.
9.) The power of unconditional love was my greatest lesson that I learned from my children. Because it challenged me to love each of them based on their individual love language yet without partiality.

At the end of the day, I am blessed to know that my Daddy in Heaven loved me so much and thought enough of me to mirror Him in the earth.